Merry Christmas

So I was determined to not let this effect our Christmas or Kearstyns.  We had an amazing one, and Kearstyn racked up from Santa and grandparents.  I was just thankful for being able to spend the day with my little family and see Kearstyns face every time she opened a present!  I will have to bragg on my Husband,  he got me a necklace to match my ring and a bracelet that said MOM on it from kearstyn.  I also got a North Face jacket, but best of all we were going to take a trip to Gatlinburg in January! We are definitely blessed!

Saying Goodbye is never easy!

So I was not sure if I wanted to post about this, however, I decided that maybe someone would read this and be inspired and keep up hope if they have been through it before.  Like I said in my previous post, we had found out we were pregnant.  We were extremely excited but a little reserved just because we have lost 3babies.  Starting off everything was fine! The baby was measuring right where it should be and we got to hear the heartbeat at 6 1/2 weeks.  It was an amazing sound to say the least!  The next week my Dr was a little worried bc the sac that the baby was in wasnt growing with the baby. He said that he didnt think it would be an issue but that we would just watch the babies growth carefully.  On the Monday before we lost the baby we went back to the Dr , baby had a strong heartbeat at 167bpm and looked great! So I felt relieved.  The next day at work I just didnt feel right.  My body was aching and my stomach was cramping, but I called my dr and he said to come in and see him the next morning just to check the baby.  Well after the store closed I went to the restroom and felt something weird.  I turned around and saw something in the toilet (sorry next part is going to be a little gross and graphic) I picked up what just looked like a mucus sac but when I looked closer I saw the baby.  I saw the eyes, the beginnings of the arms, fingers, legs and toes.  I was shocked, I dont think it fully processed in my mind that I just passed the baby. My mom came and got me and we took the baby and me to the ER.  When we got there the doctor said that I did actually give birth.  We didnt understand why it was just an all of a sudden detachment from me.  It was the most difficult event I have ever faced in my life!  To have to see your tiny baby, hold it and then give it to the nurse to they can send it off for testing was so painful!  It took me a while to get passed it and several stayes in the hospital for complications but with the support of my Husband, family and friends I got through it.  Still talking about it today brings back those feelings, but I can handle it now.  On Jan4th I had surgery to figure out what could possibly be causing this to happen so many times!  After my surgery it found out that I had a sever case of Endometriosis(which can cause miscarriages and infertility).  So my doctor lasered it out and told me that we should try soon before it grows back.  I also had a huge cyst on  my ovary that had to be drained as well.    Now we are just giving it to God and trusting that when it is right He will bless us with a healthy baby!  Im standing on His promise because my desire is to have a baby, and He gives you the desires of our hearts!  Again, this is not for pitty, but for someone who might need it, and for me also.  Im stronger because of this and I thank God for putting the people in my life who stood by us and prayed for us every step of the way! I cant thank you enough!!

Disney on Ice

Kearstyn had never been to Disney on Ice and I hadnt been since I was about her age.  So thanks to her memaw we got tickets and were able to go!  Kearstyn was amazed by all the ice skaters and loved getting to see Arial and Lilo and Stitch!  She tried to pretend to skate the entire night after we got home!

Happy Thanksgiving!

This thanksgiving we found out that we were expecting.  We couldnt have been happier bc we had already lost 3 babies prior to this.  We didnt know what was to come,but we were just happy in that moment!  We celebrated with my family and had a great day!

ROLL TIDE

I didnt get to go to a game this year, but we did get to go down for the LSU game in ttown.  The outcome of course was horrible, but we redeemed ourself :)  We had a lot of fun just tailgating and hanging out.  We got to watch GameDay and I got a lot of pictures of all the reporters!  I love tuscaloosa and I am proud to be a Alabama Fan! ROLL TIDE ROLL!

Surgery Time

In October we found out that Kearstyn had a hole in her eardrum.  So the only way to fix it was through a pretty intense surgery.  It was so hard to see my baby girl go through that! The first day was very rough because the pain medicine wouldnt work on her, so she was in a lot of pain! After a couple of days she became more like herself!  She was not happy that she couldnt jump, run, or really play for 3wks to let her skin attach to her eardrum to close it up!  But boy after those 3weeks she was SO HAPPY that she could play in PE again!

BEACH TRIP 2011

Every year we go to the beach with my family. This year we had to go in the middle of September due to my blackout dates at work.  Kearstyn LOVES the beach and always talks about going back! I had a cast on my foot, so my fun was limited.  I had to stay at the pool and just put my leg in, it wasnt much fun! But on our last day I wrapped trash bags around my cast and made it down to the sand! I wasnt going to leave without getting in atleast once!